So it will all be seen because by being all together I think it will be much more obvious and by that time I should trust my intuition but working so hard my mind is not easy for intuition to be see. This is where the difficulty may be misleading. Anyway it is all a week away but less and I'm looking forward I think. Certainly starting is the most difficult part of anything. For a time starting letters was the most difficult of all and many of them didn't or end either as if it was an end and that was all very interesting to do but probably not very practical to be receiving them as such without explanation and a wrote to Gerry an explanation that it was all very difficult and sounded rather apologetic which wasn't what you should have been at all. Still, it is in the starting the difficulties. Any way at the moment I am painting 'I met this guy'because of all of this and it is not quite what I expected to find in it.
Use of a hotel you might say. I went out to stop it all a bit because it was all very intense and all are ones and I couldn't catch it all so as I wore it out I went out to get away really. Around a table sit 5 well spaced and then six sit well spaced between. And there was room for another but no room for anything really. All the spaces fitted out with expectations and a bit of fear really well hidden. It was all very strange and so expectations are made stronger if it was very strange throughout. Knowing and not knowing.
There was a lot of bitterness well hidden but not too well in one and self pity and didn't see it yet what it is in Lee but I haven't looked yet really so I must suppose. I said someone the other day that I tried not to be sexist for having no reason for it in me but that was too.
It is like annual meadow grass growing in the gutter with a water then overflows. As the telephone rang. As I was going. As simultaneous become some people better. So coincidence is with Jane so often barely seeming. The telephone ringing was Carol to lose Estee in anger. Jane knows before. And it was. Carol had had enough for the time being. Strange how James squeezed into it all. Carol had had enough and it was all James who was a small cream dog and mentally disturbed enough.